It’s Getting Real Over Here…

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My first novel is done. Or probably done… I only say probably because of the sleep stealing fear that it’s not ready and I don’t know it. From the things I’ve read by other writers in my situation, this feeling is not uncommon. Regardless, I now stand on the cusp of query and rejection letters…

I. Am. Petrified.

I also have no idea what I’m doing! I’ve been reading a lot of information on the subject yet I still feel like a lost child in the grocery store, too frightened and shocked to begin screaming.

So when my ever first copy of “Writer’s Market” arrived in the mail yesterday… well, I nearly vomited.

I’ve been trying to light a fire under my butt for a while, but I just keep staring at my manuscript. I’ve never dealt well with rejection. Now I have to daily grapple with the thought that it’s inevitable. I WILL be rejected. I MAY be accepted eventually, but the rejection is going to happen.

It’s my baby. Those words are not made up of letters, they’re made up of me, heart, soul, and the cliché sweat, blood, and tears. The Characters are my children. I love them all in a way, even the ones you’re meant to hate. I gave birth to them one night in Lancaster, PA to the glow of my iPad while my husband slept soundly beside me. I’ve nursed them at my bosom. I’ve watched them grow, eat, sleep, fight, love, live, and die, in my sleep, in the shower, in waiting rooms, when I’m at the gym and virtually every random waking hour of my life since that night.

My last step in the nursing process was to hand out several more manuscript copies to trusted beta readers. I’m hoping that if they come back and say, “you need to try” I will have the support I need to go forward. In the end I know it will only be published if God wants it to be, but that unknown future element freaks me out.

People bungee jump all the time. You know that you won’t die from it, but I won’t believe that anyone standing at the edge of the platform about to jump isn’t at least a little nauseated from the view.

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34 thoughts on “It’s Getting Real Over Here…”

    1. You’re very kind. I will.

      Sorry, I have not gotten a chance yet. 😦 They’re on my to do list but life has been a little crazy here with some family issues. Have you had any luck with self publishing?

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  1. So exciting! I have no doubt that you will land where and with who you are supposed to land. I have that same 2015 book and it’s loaded with great information. I just sent my first round of queries out (for magazines, not book)…if I find a letter that doesn’t get flat blasted down, I’ll send your way. Writing those letters and bios were more difficult than that stories that accompanied them.
    I’m so excited for you. Please keep us updated.
    And also – I just noticed that I haven’t been getting your posts. I’m off to fix that!!
    Michelle

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much for your encouragement. I’ll take any help and advice I can get. This whole process is slow going and difficult. I’m not sure if I’m making more of it than there is or it’s still just my nerves.

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      1. Nerves!! It takes a lot of courage to put yourself out there. It’s too soon to have any results (I just sent in 6 stories last week), but I will say that it felt SO GOOD to put something in the mail. Even if they reject it, I know I tried and will try again if I need to!
        You can do the same, Rachel. You have a beautiful voice – it’s time to let others hear it 🙂

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  2. Those who know you are proud of you! We are EXCITED!!! Can’t wait to see what happens. Even if it takes awhile… or the dreadful never… you are a success in our book! …Hoping!… Praying!… Waiting!… : )

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I am on the same boat, fellow writer. I too just completed my first 62,000 word romance novel. Getting an agent feels so overwhelming, and letting go of something that I’ve worked so hard on is hard, and to send out to people who may not like it; even harder. Good luck! I know how you feel. My book is never really finished. Or maybe I’m scared to try;
    I’m scared of failure! Follow my blog and my son’s blog at readwithmeromancenovels.wordpress.com

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’ve had a decent amount of experience with this, so maybe I can prepare you a bit.

    First, you can relieve your fears by understanding that you more than likely will get rejected. Expect it because it will happen. Don’t take it personally. Even if you’ve written the greatest novel anyone could ever read, and have the most amazing characters ever, it will still be rejected if it doesn’t match what an agent is looking for.

    Second, when you do get rejected, you’re probably going to get a form letter (agents are very busy people) stating as kindly as possible that the agent is sorry for not being excited enough about your manuscript to feel like they can properly represent it, but there are other agents who may feel different so keep trying. Rejection letters are actually very nicely worded, like a soft pillow that you can fall on. You’ll still feel disappointed, but it’s nothing that will destroy your life.

    Third, if you feel like you can’t handle the rejection, you can always give self-publishing a shot. There are many avenues to getting your book published, especially with eBooks; you’re not required to go the traditional route anymore. If you really want to get your work out there to the public, you can.

    Fourth, here’s a nice article concerning rejection:
    http://www.writersdigest.com/editor-blogs/guide-to-literary-agents/no-thank-you-on-rejection-writing

    Good luck! 🙂

    Oh, and if you need help writing a query letter, shoot me an email (Contact link on my blog page). I can send you something that can guide you from start to finish.

    Good luck again! 🙂

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  5. I’ve been rejected by a lot of magazines I submitted my poetry that I thought would give me my break this past year. All the months of waiting & then, “I’m sorry, but we’re going to have to pass.” or “not what we’re looking for.” becomes instant tear-jerkers, sometimes full out crying, even if you don’t mean to. God’s been showing me, he works through small & will surprise you when you pretty much want to give up. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, Ephesians 2:20 NIV. 🙂 It really helps having friends who are writers too & encourage you that God’s got this under control, share their own struggles/ successes & pray for you. I’l pray for you & always here if you need someone to vent to. You are definitely not alone. ❤

    Also, I've been told that's a helpful boo for any writer, so push through the nauseated. (if it were me, I'd be staring at it for hours, haha.)

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  6. It’s such an achievement already, and I congratulate you on being in a place where you’ve actually finished, because the temptation to edit forever has a vice-like pull to it at times. So hurrah!

    Now, whilst rejection will hurt, and may indeed most likely happen, every time you get the cold, hard, fear begin to get a grip, or feel a lingering sense of worry, stop for a moment. And consider the moment. Think on how these feelings are affecting you physically; if you heart is beating faster, if there’s prickles on your arms, or rumbles in your stomach. As you focus on the physical aspects, the mental ones will recede in intensity. They won’t go away, and you don’t want to try and run away from fear, for it will find a way out in other ways and that isn’t healthy at all. But you don’t want to practice the miserable feeling you might/will have, when/if you get a rejection, because this makes your life as w hole less rich and more fear-filled, and also, because when you do get a rejection letter, whilst unpleasant, it will not be as bad as your imagination tells you it will be. Imaginations are wicked creatures (and brilliant ones too), who feast happily on worst and best case scenarios, which can be useful at times – it’s a form of protection, but being a writer means you employ the little scamp regularly and that’s how you arrived at this moment – it can be useful and a joy, but also negative and damaging generally. Step away from the imagined misery and pain, and enjoy today, more than that enjoy this moment, and the next and so on when it happens. You can accept it will happen, but don’t live it in advance.

    Now think of all you have achieved up to now, the journey to a place of pure happiness at having written….a book!! I’m enormously impressed and chuffed for you, get chuffed too *laughs* That sounds rude, but it isn’t.

    – sonmi hugging Rachel with congratulations upon the Cloud

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  7. I have a friend who teaches literature in college who has sent out her novel (based on own childhood) to many publishers only to get rejected. I think the most difficult thing is to realize that publishers do not always want to promote your heart, soul, sweat, blood and tears. They want the titillating fluff that a lot of readers prefer. It is going to happen. Do not let it wear you down. While you keep trying to get it published, keep on writing.

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  8. You can do it! God already has your book all planned out 🙂 After all, isn’t He the Master Publisher and the greatest Author of all time? You can trust Him with your book! He knows what you are going through! And we are cheering for you all the way 🙂

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  9. You can do it! God has it all planned out already, you can trust Him with your book 🙂 After all, isn’t He the Master Publisher and greatest Author of all time? He knows what you’re going through! And we are cheering for you all the way 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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